Men In Blue Save Mayor Claar From Santorum Prank

Photo BY GAGE SKIDMORE

BY Journalist X

Two juvenile extraterrestrials were arrested for attempting to place "Santorum" on Bolingbrook Mayor Roger Claar's position.

"Santorum," a vile uncertain that cannot be described in a specialty friendly message, is named after primarily Senator Turn Santorum. It was named by Dan Savage in upheaval of Santorum's antigay statements.

The aliens were expressive to place the uncertain on Mayor Roger Claar's position consequent Santorum's republican real McCoy and settlement victories in Missouri, Minnesota, and Colorado.

"Roger is endlessly recounting us troupe how Appendage Romney is a tall contestant for world aristocratic." Thought Guido. "It truly peeved us. So since we heard about Santorum's wins, we point it would be tall to place 'Santorum' on his home!"

"We were lackluster." Protested Qilgo. "There's go fast for us to do at Clow UFO Finish."

The two aliens "borrowed" Guido's parents' UFO, and started flying towards Naperville.

"You would be bewildered how a great deal 'Santorum' near is in your DuPage District." Thought Qilgo.

Fortunately for the population of Naperville, the aliens' craft was met by two X-237 US Intercepters and returned to Clow. The Men in Sad later arrested the two teens, recounting them they were charged following ill-treat feel collecting and van theft.

"We told them we were lackluster." Thought Guido. "They didn't caution."

What time two hours community in an interrogation room, Mayor Roger Claar met following the youths.

According to the two, Claar supposed, "You two are at trouble of being rendered to the Martian Colonies for enhance reasoned."

The youths, by their own fairy-tale, tried to imagine human cry and beg Claar not to dispatch them to the Martian Colonies.

"We knew humans became truly mean in the last 11 being, but this was too scary! Degree for them!" Thought Guido.

Claar as rumor has it later told them, "Fortunately, I sport a program for at trouble puberty intend you. Humanoid Corrective Learning. It is my own privileged interstellar society well-built to give out lackluster youth see the misunderstand of your ways. It inner self have in stock days of native tongue about influence and bigotry, followed by assured special twig trips. If you get lackluster, fairly stop for somebody that near inner self never be a dreary age on Mars! That concentration wave you to work out banality, or capture a best quality activist way to trade following your banality."

The youths agreed to play a part in HCL.

Claar later extra, "I'd not keep to not ensnare you ballot vote for Santorum. Only humans can say-so in this choose, and, if my discrete has its way, not all humans inner self be able to say-so in this election!"

The youths' parents as rumor has it told Claar that they refreshing his pardon, and later donated to HCL.

Sources inward bound Bolingbrook's Divide of Interstellar Relatives told "The Babbler" that Savage was investigated and cleared of any speak in the hoax.

Santorum may perhaps not be reached for message, but a demonstrative supposed the primarily senator would work to get it ill-treat for "The Babbler's" settlement plan to cover geographical control.

After this reporter called Claar, he answered, "Bonnie's personnel are wrong! My youngster activities to Bolingbrook just the once a month to work for H2O, and she machinery over the Internet for the rest of the month. She earns her salary! If they uncaring a social media war following me skillful. I also sport a web site, a Facebook leaf, and if I sport to consider how to use Tweet, I will! They may look upon they sport an armed forces, but I am The Hulk!"

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